November 13, 2007

Diabetes and relationships

by



TUESDAY, NOVEMBER 13
9PM EST

Janis Roszler, RD, CDE, LD/N
Janis has been counseling and motivating individuals with diabetes and other health and nutritional concerns for over 20 years. She knows how hard it is to introduce healthy behaviors into a busy life. Let her help you take the small steps needed to meet your personal health goals.

Check out her website atย www.dearjanis.com

*** (21:01):Welcome to Janis Rozler Chat , Janis Roszler !

diabetes sukz says to (21:01):
hiii

Janis Roszler says to (21:01):
Hi everyone!!!

ersurgeongirlie says to (21:01):
hi

gina says to (21:01):
Hi janis!

Jeff says to (21:01):
hi

kristaw says to (21:01):
hi Janis

gina says to (21:01):
How is everyone doing!

clanster says to (21:01):
hola

Sammy4486 says to (21:02):
hi

vicky says to (21:02):
hello

toppchef68 says to (21:02):
hi

jon says (21:02):
hello Janis Roszler

vicky says to (21:02):
hello everyone!

diabetes sukz says to (21:02):
wow otz of ppl on lolz

Janis Roszler says to (21:02):
Hello jon!

gina says to (21:02):
THIS CHAT WILL START IN 2 MINUTES

diabetes sukz says to (21:03):
kol

gina says to (21:03):
It is a scheduled chat with Janis Rozler about Diabetes and Relationships

kristaw says to (21:03):
i can’t wait

saraknic says to (21:03):
good – i’m in the right room lol

gina says to (21:03):
we can give people a few minutes to get in

Jeff says to (21:04):
lets pop the cork on this chat

gina says to (21:04):
lol

gina says to (21:04):
go ahead pop the cork!

clanster says to (21:04):
sometimes i get mad and say hurtful things that i would not normally say

gina says to (21:04):
janis are you there?

Jeff says to (21:04):
POP…………………:D

Janis Roszler says to (21:04):
Yep!

gina says to (21:04):
haha

Janis Roszler says to (21:04):
We can pop the cork on champagne and get the romance started!

toppchef68 says to (21:04):
๐Ÿ˜€

gina says to (21:05):
OK I GUESS WE CAN START. ask away people but, give janis some time to answer between questions

clanster says to (21:05):
lol

toppchef68 says to (21:05):
ok

toppchef68 says to (21:05):
ladies first

gina says to (21:05):
such a gentleman

Jeff says to (21:05):
smooth top

jon says (21:05):
Janis, can you tell us a little about what you do?

Janis Roszler says to (21:06):
I’m a diabtes educator/dietitian, writer, radio host and lots of other things.

chris1993 says to (21:06):
back

Janis Roszler says to (21:06):
My newest book is SEX AND DIABETES -FOR HIM AND FOR HER

toppchef68 says to (21:06):
do you have the d

Janis Roszler says to (21:06):
I had gestational diabetes and my hubby has type 2

clanster says to (21:06):
its cold and rainy here, i might have to read that book Janis

kristaw says to (21:06):
how do i get my husband to relate with my diabetes and stop saying what he would do better than me?

toppchef68 says to (21:07):
great q

kristaw says to (21:07):
thanks

Janis Roszler says to (21:07):
for that, I suggest he read my first book, THE SECRETS OF LIVING AND LOVING WITH DIABETES. It has quizzes and discussion topics that the two of you can do together to understand diabetes better.

ersurgeongirlie says to (21:08):
how would you deal with a significant other who is afraid of needles and all things diabetes related (ok fears the stuff), but you feel its important for him or her to learn, in case they need to assist you when ill or whatever?

Janis Roszler says to (21:08):
Were you afraid when you first started using needles? If so, how did you overcome the fear?

clanster says to (21:08):
yeah my mom almost passed out when i was teaching her how to inject me

River says to (21:08):
Both my husband and I have Type 2 diabetes, but I also have ESRD as of this year. How do you deal with two people having chronic diseases in the relationship?

ersurgeongirlie says to (21:08):
well it was life or death for me, lol

Sharon says to (21:09):
Hi Janis, nice to be able to chat with you. By the way, Paula, says hi.

Sharon says to (21:09):
Forgot – This is Sharon

kitter says to (21:09):
Sorry I’m late… i had to wash my hair seeing that this was about relationships…

Sammy4486 says to (21:09):
lol

Janis Roszler says to (21:10):
He will rise to the occasion if he needs to. Just continue to keep a positive attitude and ask him to assist you as much as he can. Let him understand that you may need his help in an emergency. He will slowly come around.

toppchef68 says to (21:10):
my wife is trying to understand but she has a hard time understanding my complications how do i help her understand

ersurgeongirlie says to (21:10):
thanks!

gina says to (21:10):
my fiance gave m e a shot for the first time on a vacation last year

gina says to (21:10):
in my arm because i was having site problems while we were away

kitter says to (21:10):
eek Gina… I’ve never trusted anyone to do that

Janis Roszler says to (21:11):
For River – when you have 2 folks with medical issues, it is helpful to focus on non-medical things and inject fun into your life. Take walks, rent movies, reconnect and strengthen your relationship. It is good to take an emotional break.

gina says to (21:11):
it brought us closer togther i know that sounds weird

Janis Roszler says to (21:11):
Hi Sharon, Hi Paula!

saraknic says to (21:12):
‘inject’ fun – lol!

gina says to (21:12):
lol

kristaw says to (21:12):
my husband gives me glucagons all the time, but he is almost cold about it.

clanster says to (21:12):
as in the emergency sugar gina?

blondy2061h says to (21:12):
hi everyone

gina says to (21:12):
no

gina says to (21:12):
hi

gina says to (21:12):
blondy

kitter says to (21:12):
Hey

blondy2061h says to (21:12):
glucagon is a hormone

blondy2061h says to (21:12):
it stimulates the liver to release glycogen

clanster says to (21:13):
im thinking of glycagen

clanster says to (21:13):
or whatever

sstrumello says to (21:13):
Good evening everyone!

blondy2061h says to (21:13):
which is sugar stored in the liver

blondy2061h says to (21:13):
hi scott

kitter says to (21:13):
hey Scott!

toppchef68 says to (21:13):
janis how due you explain about complications

Sammy4486 says to (21:13):
janis, how should people handle those intimaate moments in case of a low blood sugar or where to put a pump etc..

clanster says to (21:14):
where do you learn about like the science of diabetes, everything i see is just the basics

toppchef68 says to (21:14):
my wife doen’t understand

gina says to (21:14):
hey scott

Janis Roszler says to (21:14):
Hi Sammy,

lgvincent says to (21:14):
Howdy, neighbor!

kitter says to (21:14):
hey Lowell

blondy2061h says to (21:14):
hi Lowell

gina says to (21:14):
hey! loweell

Janis Roszler says to (21:14):
Test before you begin intimate activity. Keep snack foods on hand and keep your sense of humor!

Sammy4486 says to (21:15):
so its almost like going to the gym

kitter says to (21:15):
Its embarrasing when it happens.. like, afterwards when you regain some senses

Sammy4486 says to (21:15):
test before you dress haha

lgvincent says to (21:15):
Guess that’s information I’ll never need but thanks!

Sharon says to (21:15):
Janis, I seem to be doing much better now. My counselor and I decided that I don’t have to see her anymore unless I really need to. I have decided to accept Larry’s policing. He is what I need and he really wants to help me. – Shaorn

Janis Roszler says to (21:15):
Hi clanster – there is a lot of info that goes beyond the basics. Start reading info written for health professionals.

kitter says to (21:15):
but testing before hand can be such a passion killer… sorry honey, i know you’re ready to go, but i need to bleed and snack first

lgvincent says to (21:15):
Have you started with your pump, kitter?

kitter says to (21:16):
not yet Lowell.. my ed is still on vacation… but my pump is sitting in front of me looking OH SO pretty

Jeff says to (21:16):
I hear that kitter

vicky says to (21:16):
i went low a couple of times and it was a total mood killer. cant even get back into it

lgvincent says to (21:16):
(If I’m talking to who I think I am.)

jon says (21:16):
use chocolate sauce

gina says to (21:16):
hey betty

lgvincent says to (21:16):
I’ll bet!

kitter says to (21:16):
Seriously, Vicky… I agree. Sweating in bed should be for the right reasons!!

kitter says to (21:16):
LOL jon

vicky says to (21:16):
good idea jon!

clanster says to (21:16):
Janis, do you know of any online resoucres? Like free PDF documents, or anything of that nature?

Janis Roszler says to (21:17):
Testing is a natural part of who you are. Turn it into a game. If you are in a normal range, your partner must kiss you. If you are low, your partner must feed you! Etc.

sstrumello says to Janis Roszler (21:17):
Janice, any recommendations you would offer for choosing an endocrinologist? I have found some recommended people may have had excellent credentials, but had horrible bedside manner!

bjphilly says to (21:17):
hu

ersurgeongirlie says to (21:17):
well my Sig. Other and I have um, brought food into the bedroom when needed…nothing is as romantic as feeding each other strawberries and chocolate syrup. it gets the blood sugar up! lol

ersurgeongirlie says to (21:17):
just an idea

gina says to (21:17):
scott you should go to my doc

gina says to (21:17):
he is the best

gina says to (21:17):
in mineola

kitter says to (21:17):
see, this place is full of great ideas ๐Ÿ˜‰

lgvincent says to (21:17):
I’ve gone with that idea!

Jeff says to (21:17):
clan, grab a microbiology book at the library. it will have more than you want

gina says to (21:18):
er good idea

gina says to (21:18):
jeff lol

markman says to (21:18):
are there any carbs in edible underwear?

kitter says to (21:18):
OMG LOL

clanster says to (21:18):
would it be the same to google search microbiology jeff?

Jeff says to (21:18):
lol

blondy2061h says to (21:18):
Janis- I was wondering how you feel about prophylactic use of statins and aces in people with diabetes? My lipid panal is nearly perfect, but they want me on a statin because my LDL is 107. I know statins are relatively safe drgus, but still…

gina says to (21:18):
lmaooo

bdva50 says to (21:18):
lol

ersurgeongirlie says to (21:18):
check the packaging

Jeff says to (21:18):
15 per serving

toppchef68 says to (21:18):
yes it is all sugar

ersurgeongirlie says to (21:18):
lol

gina says to (21:18):
really jeff?

kitter says to (21:18):
omg i’m crying now.. LOL

Jeff says to (21:18):
lol

Jeff says to (21:18):
depends on brands

kitter says to (21:19):
I guess it depends on the size of the undies too, eh?

Janis Roszler says to (21:19):
markman – regarding carbs in edible underwear – it depends what it is made of. Check the label.

markman says to (21:19):
i think i ate it already

saraknic says to (21:19):
too funny!

toppchef68 says to (21:19):
janis how do explain neuropathy to some who is healthy

Janis Roszler says to (21:20):
clanster – what type of free info are you looking for?

Jeff says to (21:20):
checking the carb info on the underwear before you eat them can really be a mood killer

Janis Roszler says to (21:20):
Hi toppchef,

toppchef68 says to (21:20):
hi

lgvincent says to (21:20):
It can’t be much.

lgvincent says to (21:20):
I wouldn’t think.

jon says (21:20):
probably mostly fiber

sstrumello says to jon (21:21):
Or sugar and high fructose corn syrup!

clanster says to (21:21):
well my ultimate goal is to specialize in diabete, but on a low income im looking for a way to get a jump start

Janis Roszler says to (21:21):
I like to suggest using my first book, THE SECRETS OF LIVING AND LOVING WITH DIABETES. It has quizzes that the two of you can take together that explain different diabetes topics. Lots of couples have used it and found it really helps explain things

saraknic says to (21:21):
i’d say checking the packaging is less of a mood killer than the alternatives!

clanster says to (21:21):
like the history and management methods

toppchef68 says to (21:21):
thanks

gina says to (21:21):
sara i agree haha

clanster says to (21:22):
how the complications were discovered, and everything about what goes on inside your body

gina says to (21:22):
but i guess you would have to look before you “do it” lol

sstrumello says to (21:22):
Plan ahead and read the labels in advance!

Janis Roszler says to (21:22):
Remember, you can turn anything into a game. Checking the packaging of candy underwear can be the source of lots of giggles.

Janis Roszler says to (21:22):
Remember, intimacy is supposed to be FUN!

vicky says to (21:22):
i will check the package janis lol

vicky says to (21:22):
lmao

clanster says to (21:23):
yeah what’s the serving size *wink

blondy2061h says to (21:23):
My question sorta got lost in the laugher

blondy2061h says to (21:23):
laughter

kitter says to (21:23):
its not a chore? ๐Ÿ˜ฎ

gina says to (21:23):
blondy you can ask again

Janis Roszler says to (21:23):
Sorry. I think I’m missing some questions.

gina says to (21:24):
we will give you a chance t o catch up

clanster says to (21:24):
I was wondering about a good source of professional diabetes info, perhaps online and free of charge?

gina says to (21:24):
clan

gina says to (21:24):
IM me

clanster says to (21:24):
ok

blondy2061h says to (21:24):
Janis- I was wondering how you feel about prophylactic use of ACEI and Statins in diabetics. My lipid panel is borderline, with an LDL of 107, an HDL of 57, trigs of 63 and a total of 170. I know these meds are generally safe, but all meds have risks

Janis Roszler says to (21:24):
The diabetes websites are filled with great info. Check out diabetes.org they have a special section for health professionals.

Janis Roszler says to (21:25):
Hi blondy,

Janis Roszler says to (21:25):
Most experts find that the protection that ACE inhibitors and statins offer are worth the risk.

sstrumello says to blondy2061h (21:25):
… and side effects!

Janis Roszler says to (21:25):
everything has side effects …..even candy underwear!!!!

ersurgeongirlie says to (21:25):
how can I help my sig. other understand me and my moods, since im pregnant and diabetic and i realize that my moods are as swinging as my blood sugars were when I was a partying teenager, lol. I dont want to be hurtful but it has happened a few time ๐Ÿ™

Jeff says to (21:25):
lol

kristaw says to (21:26):
he has been there since the beginning and i sometimes think it is harder for him than for me. his mother died when he was only 7 with a chronic illness also. so maybe it is fear?

blondy2061h says to (21:26):
that’s what i meant by risks, scott

blondy2061h says to (21:26):
yes, the literature I’ve seen suggests the use is beneficial too

Janis Roszler says to (21:26):
I have 4 kids. Been there, done that. He isn’t going to totally understand your moods. Just do the best that you can.

vicky says to (21:26):
ha its enough you have diabetes but pregnant too that should speak for itself!

ersurgeongirlie says to (21:26):
i know right!

blondy2061h says to (21:26):
my pharmacology prof practically jumped down my throat when she found out I wasn’t on an ACEI

terrylee says to (21:26):
I had side eefects with neurontin. I had 0 sex drive wile on it.

vicky says to (21:26):
you want me to come and talk to him lol

ersurgeongirlie says to (21:27):
if you want to vicky

ersurgeongirlie says to (21:27):
lol, give him a good lesson

vicky says to (21:27):
i will haha

kitter says to (21:27):
plus, being female, we are naturally entitled to mood swings, IMO

blondy2061h says to (21:27):
and my hsCRP is high, so I need all the cardioprotection I can get

gina says to (21:27):
what is hscrp

Janis Roszler says to (21:27):
Yes. We are born with permission to be very difficult to understand. It is our right.

gina says to (21:27):
got that right

toppchef68 says to clanster (21:27):
got thst right

blondy2061h says to (21:27):
high sensitivity c-reactive protein

ersurgeongirlie says to (21:28):
lol, yeah i felt bad because i blew up at him for being pissy after him being pulled over and he got hurt, and I had to apologize

ersurgeongirlie says to (21:28):
it was a rough night

blondy2061h says to (21:28):
it’s a test that when elevated is associated with increased risk for cardiac disease

gina says to (21:28):
oh

kitter says to (21:28):
I was asked by a male friend one day why women act in the yo yo way they do.. I said “because we can”

gina says to (21:28):
thanks

gina says to (21:28):
janis, how do you get a controlling mom to get off your back

blondy2061h says to (21:28):
i’m still on edge about the idea of taking statins and ACEIs though

bdva50 says to lgvincent (21:28):
hello

Janis Roszler says to (21:28):
Focus on the good times. When you feel well, try to spend quality time together. It is like putting money into the bank. When you have a mood swing, he won’t feel as badly.

sstrumello says to blondy2061h (21:28):
You should know that research suggests the cardiovascular risk for type 1 and type 2 (namely, the source of inflammation causing cardiovascular disease) are different. Type 1 may be autoimmune-mediated according to research from U.C. Davis

gina says to (21:28):
and stop treating you like a 12 yr old

Janis Roszler says to (21:29):
Hi Gina,

River says to (21:29):
Hear hear, I have a controlling mom too, and I’m 47

gina says to (21:29):
i am 32

toppchef68 says to (21:29):
im 39

kristaw says to (21:29):
mine is a mom and a nurse practioner on top of that

gina says to (21:29):
EEEESH

gina says to (21:29):
i guess moms will always be moms

kristaw says to (21:29):
tell me about it

blondy2061h says to (21:29):
Research also shows that type 1s are still at higher risk for cardiac disease than non-diabetics though

kitter says to (21:29):
my mum is a nurse, but she knows my temper.. she goes easy on me ๐Ÿ˜€

gina says to (21:29):
yea i have heard that before

gina says to (21:30):
chris

blondy2061h says to (21:30):
and if inflammation is the problem, autoimmune disease in and of themselves cause inflammation

ersurgeongirlie says to (21:30):
good night!

Janis Roszler says to (21:30):
Controlling relatives are tough. There are a few things you can do. 1. limit your visits. 2. Tell her exactly what she wants to hear (and do what you want. 3. appreciate that she loves you, but do your own thing.

toppchef68 says to (21:30):
my mom is over 800 miles a way and still has to know everything

blondy2061h says to (21:30):
lol

gina says to (21:30):
umm janis

gina says to (21:30):
i still live home lol

gina says to (21:30):
im a loserrrr

kristaw says to (21:30):
mine lives 1200 miles away

toppchef68 says to (21:30):
no you are not

gina says to (21:30):
5 more months and im married lol

toppchef68 says to (21:30):
not going live at home then r u gina

toppchef68 says to (21:31):
๐Ÿ˜€

gina says to (21:31):
haha

clanster says to blondy2061h (21:31):
your just comfortable gina

kitter says to (21:31):
Gina, come stay with me til the wedding :p

kristaw says to (21:31):
and then you will hear the divorce rate for diabetics and marriage. that is what my mom says

Janis Roszler says to (21:31):
Smile and say thank you a lot! She loves you and that is how she is showing it. it isn’t fair, but that is your reality.

gina says to (21:31):
whoa kitter that is waaaay too far lol

Janis Roszler says to (21:31):
kristaw,

kristaw says to (21:31):
yes,

sstrumello says to blondy2061h (21:31):
Yes, but there’s also some thought that a) it may not be preventable and b) the treatment protocols used for type 2 may not address the source of inflammation as it does with type 1, and vice versa.

kitter says to (21:31):
aw come on, its only a 23 hr flight!

gina says to (21:31):
yea i guess you arae right, i can get really nasty sometimes especailly during a low

Janis Roszler says to (21:31):
Where did you see stats for diabetics and marriage? I don’t know of any official ones.

kristaw says to (21:32):
my mom tells me, and my doctor has also said that it is a big downer

Janis Roszler says to (21:32):
Glad to hear that you will be married soon, Gina. That will definitely help your situation!

sstrumello says to blondy2061h (21:32):
… but it does not occur in all patients!

gina says to (21:32):
thanks! i am getting a pump pocket in my wedding gown. that is for aanother chat though haha

kitter says to (21:32):
LOL awesome Gina

Janis Roszler says to (21:33):
From what I know, your mom is not correct. marriage is difficult for everyone. Sometimes problems, like diabetes bring people together.

gina says to (21:33):
i believe that janis

kristaw says to (21:33):
i hope so we have been married for 16 years and it has had its ups and downs but mostly ups

gina says to (21:33):
if you have a caring person you are with it should be the same as if you didnt have diabetes

Jeff says to (21:33):
I’m married because of diabetes

gina says to (21:33):
REALLY JEFF!

Janis Roszler says to (21:34):
You have to really be open if you are married to a partner with diabetes. You have to be willing to talk about sex and testing and feelings. Most people don’t do that.

gina says to (21:34):
tell us!

blondy2061h says to (21:34):
Janis- what are some good foods a person can eat to naturally lower their LDLs?

toppchef68 says to (21:34):
i has made it alittle tougher for me my wife got mad because of the complication and that i almost died from it

Jeff says to (21:34):
I realized how badly I wanted to live and went for it

kitter says to (21:34):
awesome, jeff!! I’m single cuz men (mostly!!) are idiots ๐Ÿ˜›

gina says to (21:34):
lol

bdva50 says to (21:34):
lol

Sharon says to (21:34):
Between my diabetes and his enlarged protsate – well…

jon says (21:34):
kitter, you are just meeting the wrong men

toppchef68 says to (21:34):
no we just act that way

terrylee says to (21:35):
I have not heard any statistics about D and divorce. I have D for almost twenyt years and will cellebrate my 39th aniversity in Feb. 08. It has not changed anything.

Janis Roszler says to (21:35):
toppchef, diabetes can bring guilt into a relationship. Keep talking and put some effort into bringing fun back into your relationship.

lgvincent says to (21:35):
I know men are idiots! I are one! (At least, I THINK I am.)

gina says to (21:35):
congrats terry lee!

sstrumello says to kitter (21:35):
try dating women, you may like it!

River says to (21:35):
My husband has taken to himself the role of caregiver because of my kidney failure, and it seems to bring us closer together at least some of the time. We have a good marriage in general.

toppchef68 says to (21:35):
i am trying

kitter says to (21:35):
Jon, send over some nice, single, smart ones to Aus for me then please ๐Ÿ™‚

gina says to (21:35):
i know for me

bdva50 says to (21:35):
been married 31 and was diagnosed in 99… she has been my best ally

gina says to (21:35):
at one point in my relationship 6 months before we got engaged we almost broke up because of my denial of having diabetes

Janis Roszler says to (21:36):
see? Lots of great relationships here tonight! I’ve been married for 25 years.

jon says to kitter (21:36):
i will see what i can do

bdva50 says to (21:36):
wooohooo

kristaw says to (21:36):
i think part of our problem is family and also that is mom died of a chronic disease when he was only 7

gina says to (21:36):
maybe not denial but my depression

kristaw says to (21:36):
his

Sharon says to (21:36):
In spite of things we have been married for 33 1/2 years.

kitter says to jon (private) (21:36):
thanks!! lol

Janis Roszler says to (21:36):
depression is rough.

jon says to kitter (private) (21:36):
no problem

i think i have diabetes says to (21:36):
ill say

Sharon says to (21:36):
You can say that again, Janis

bdva50 says to (21:37):
agrees

gina says to (21:37):
i was diagnosed at 25 so, i went through a time where i never talked about it to anyone including him

toppchef68 says to (21:37):
i have been married for 15 year s diagnoses 8ye

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